Mike's Hot Dogs

"The most useless are those that never change throughout the years."  This little pearl of arrogant wisdom comes to us today from Sir J.M. Barrie.  For those of you who may not recognize the name right off the bat, you'll certainly know his most famous work.  He's the writer of Peter Pan, that prepubescent Robin Hood mixed with a dash of the ageless Dick Clark for good measure.   It's a tad ironic, I suppose, that he was the one to have uttered this phrase.  He would have held his tongue I'm sure, if he had ever been to Mike's Hot Dogs.

The sign above the door says "Serving you for over 50 years," although our server stated that it's already passed by sixty.  And though I can imagine the windows out onto Erie Boulevard have seen Schenectady change dramatically over those six decades, I have a feeling the menu inside hasn't varied much, if at all.  And you know what?  It would be a crying shame if it had.

As we witness the return of the classic Americana in fashion, music, all the nostalgia of yesteryear, why not take a moment to check out a place that never left?  More and more restaurants today are trying to emulate the feeling of the classic diner, that warm-blanket familiarity you get sitting down at the counter of a proper greasy spoon.  It's tough to rationalize going to an imitation, when the real thing is just down the road.

"All the Way"

"Do you want to go all the way?" she asked.  My hands go clammy. My tongue dries up. I stutter over my words.  It's not often I'm asked this question in public.  In fact, it's not often I'm asked this question, full stop.  I muster up my courage, and look deep into her eyes.  "Absolutely.  I'll take a chocolate shake as well."  There, my order was in.  I've been hearing rumors of the "All the Way" hot dog here, but it must be seen to be believed.  Mustard, onions, meat sauce, and pure joy heaped on top of a hot dog.  Is there a quicker route to bliss?  The answer is yes, and it involves washing it all down with that chocolate shake I ordered.  

You sit there and devour your meal, served up in no time flat.  You think, if only I could somehow eat here three meals a day, I may finally achieve lasting peace in my life.  And then you see it; the breakfast menu perched above either end of the long counter.  And the deals just keep on coming.  Breakfast sandwiches, eggs, bacon, the things that make America great.  It's simple, it's cheap, and it's all you ever need.  You contemplate asking to set up a cot in the storage room, why leave? Admit it, it was on your mind too.  

 In this day and age, I think we're all aware of what's in a hot dog.  Or maybe it's that we're aware that we're unaware what's in a hot dog.  Follow me?  At the end of the day, a hot dog works for people on any diet.  Even vegans!  Let's admit it, there's probably not a whole bunch of any recognizable animal product in a hot dog these days.  But that doesn't matter folks!  Where else can you buy bliss for a buck seventy-nine?  You can't.  Fact.

 I know many of you readers have driven by this place on at least one occasion, and pulling off Erie at any time of day can be a daunting task.  But the next time you see it coming up ahead, make the turn.  I'm very lucky, as I live quite literally around the corner.  It's busy, really busy, most of the day.  Our waitress told us that the hardest times were when it was slow.  She said she just ended up eating the food there.  I told her I couldn't think of a better way to pass the time.

As for passing your own time, dear reader, I hope that you've got a great weekend ahead.  Try to make Mike's a part of it.  As always, thank you for reading!